Monday, September 19, 2011

Syosset and Aspie Friends

I have been cleansing my Face-Book friends list of those whom I do not regularly interact with or who show lack of respect. If they can read this, then they were probably not "de-friended." I value you! Patricia Caplan, Chantri Waddoups, Sharon Tanzer Kirschner, Sharla Kogel Hearne, Teresa Clementi, Robert Lemenze, Stephanie Bayer Franz, John Holliday, Robin Matheson, Wendy Weatherington, Ryan Collin, Margo Vacca Kemp, Shelly Betancourt, Brit M Dauzat, Alan Da Costa, and Brianne Fulton value me.

Although I have been in Florida since 2005, I have finally been in a Bealls and Tuesday-Morning for the first time. The first is a discount store reminiscent of Alexanders. The later is Home Furnishings close-out store. They are part of my big-box brisk-walk-daily program. I purchased a 6' HDMI cable for $4! and a GE 4-LED light strip for $5!

Frustration is maintaining a brisk walk in Bed Bath & Beyond. This would include Home Depot and Staples.

NT is neuro-typical like you and most people are. (not Aspie) Aspies are accustomed and more comfortable doing things in solitary. Social interaction is what we are greatly challenged with, and therefore are uncomfortable in inter-personal relations. (they are LESS "fun") Aspies do not get "Clued in" It is the difference and advantage of not doing something in solitary that Aspies wonder about all the time. You NTs accept it as a paradym.

I greatly enjoy, appreciate, and seek out friends, like you or SG. Unfortunately, people often misunderstand me. They often leave me, or I must leave them (such as in the case with SG). I have therefore led a very lonely life (until FB) My wife loves me, and wanted us to get married. I personalty did not understand the logic. It feels good to have someone who cares about me, around. This is one person we can develop a relationship with, that is so hard to do with others. She has the empathy that is necessary. I am seeking to understand how she understands the value of marriage.

LMH: "It fascinates me to think that neurotypical people can't all just take a step back and think to themselves, yes, to most people that might seem like a strange question but it is NOT for an Aspie. And in the world of spectrum disorders, many of the people I work with (who are in their early 20s), have a difficult enough time connecting with a person in conversation let alone maintaining friendships or intimate relationships (and intimacy is more than sex, Stephen). Many Aspies have so much difficulty in interpersonal relationships that even having a friend is challenging. Think of having challenges with even having friends and then think how much of you goes into an intimate relationship. And when so much of the life of an Aspie is trying to navigate a neurotypical world in what others feel is "socially appropriate", the fact that Andrew even asks these questions to get an honest opinion is something I look up to." When you've met a person on the spectrum, that's all you've done, met ONE person on the spectrum.

AIL: Exceptionally insightful and articulate LMH! Thank you! You even helped me see things from an NT view point!

Stephen Gyetko: "Andrew, you totally nailed it. You're so lucky to have someone like your wife, as I'm lucky to have found someone. It must be tough to figure it all out, but suffice to say, she loves you and 'it's a groove'. Be good to each other and only good can come of it. As you said previously, the world is a noisy, complicated and conflicting place for you. It must be like trying to make tactile sense of something while wearing oven mitts. Best of luck always and thanks for the Syosset site. It's made me appreciate all over again how lucky I was and how much that great little town gave me."

AIL I very much look forward to future communication from you Stephen Gyetko

LMH: Stephen, that is awesome that you understand a little bit more about the Aspie perspective. And yes, it's hard for ANY of us to find someone and be lucky enough to be loved. Temple Grandin describes autism and spectrum disorders as feeling like an "anthropologist on Mars" which is so close to your oven mitt comment that I love it.

AIL Yes LMH, Stephen Gyetko's oven mit analogy was excellent. He comes up with good ones.

LMH I'm more than impressed. I think he nailed it as well. We seem to have smart people who comment on your threads and there's nothing I enjoy more than discussing what I feel so passionate about.

AIL Ditto. I enjoy collecting smart people, and keeping them around. I am thrilled to have you as a friend.

I drive to a big box stores or mall to walk briskly for about 45 minutes. I try to do this daily because I believe the exercise is beneficial to my health. It is always too hot and humid outside here in Florida. I do not have money for a Health club, or insurance. I am indefinitely unemployed. I am otherwise at home 24/7 except when I grocery shop. My entertainment is seeing the change of retail entities and products.

You know you are an Aspie if you do this...

9/11/11: I hung my 9.3+ foot flag outside in front of 2 of my four living room bay windows, hiding them both. This is to honor our heroes of 9/11/01. 9/11/11 My Community Association and Management are controlled by a few oppressive cowardly bullies who have been making slanderous statements against my wife, me, and my website. At the request of my wife, a Director on the Board, I have removed the following from the above site: "This website will not be ruled by terrorists. "All are welcome" on 9/21/11 at 7pm to open that cockpit (veranda) door and take control of our Hidden Village community. "Let's Roll"

I am so happy that my Condo Owners Association has approved paid for and hung up in front of our community, a custom-made large metal sign for the website and newsletter that I created. It says ""

LMH: Hey Andrew- I wanted to actually thank you for helping to open my eyes to so many new things in the Aspie community.... I will be continuing to read your blog as it is such an excellent resource and SO brilliantly done! Thank you for it!

My biggest frustration I find with people and society: The inability to identify, understand and explain one's feelings, and the unwillingness to express them honestly and openly.

This message was found on "I'm blown away by the magnitude of your talent & the way you incorporate so many pieces of information into your creative and clever design aesthetic. Cannot wait to delve further in :)" Thank you Christine-Marie Licato Olds! Renee Zamow Bevard, Christine-Marie Licato Olds and Robin Matheson like this.

9/3/11 Thank you Stephen Gyetko for this: "I've learned so much about the whole aspie thing since getting on the "You know you're from Syosset if..." site. You've done a tremendous job educating people in general about the whole thing. If there's an organization focused on aspie issues, they would do well to use your talents to further the cause of aspie acceptance." Shelly Betancourt, Francine Ahrenstein Kass and LMH like this.

Aspie eyes are wired differently, and appear different than assumed. Christine-Marie Licato Olds likes this.

LMH It's fascinating to me that I didn't know what an "Aspie" was until I looked it up. I have a master's degree in Special Education and I do 1:1 community coaching (habilitation and socialization) with young adults with ASD's. Is this a new or recent term? AIL Aspie, as you may have found out is an affectionate name for an individual with Asperger's Syndrome. You many find much information on it at Thank you for your interest!

LMH: Definitely interested, I'm going to check out your blog, they aren't even teaching the term in education classes yet, and they should. It takes a condition some find stigmatizing or scary (from all the unknowns) and makes it relatable. I like it a LOT. I love the blog! I love the way you are able to demonstrate that there are different ways to think about ANYTHING just by being who you are! So inspiring!

AIL I very much appreciate you interest. There are many ways to bring up only the posts regarding A.S. you can click on Aspie in the LABELs list on the lower left, type aspie in one of the search boxes, etc.

I will be exploring in more detail, definitely. But you have piqued my interest and I look forward to learning more.

CMLO: I'm surprised they aren't teaching AS...been years since I did undergrad (initially Special Ed, but then switched) I'm guessing some programs lump all Autism Spectrum diaga into one pile which is unfortunate. Andrew provides copious amounts of info; his interesting & unique take on life @ people & most important, a window into the Aspie world for NTs. I'm blown away by his observations, honesty & endless creativity.

LMH: I just meant they never teach the term "Aspie". However, since much of my work is with the ASD population, I find AIL's information to be extremely helpful. Currently I'm providing 1:1 habilitation for individuals on the spectrum and his blog is an incredible resource to me!

CMLO The more I see of your designs the more I want to see (and the symbolism etc=incredible) Hoping for opportunity to hire you to create cool new materials for my org.

9/2/11 For the first time ever, my wife's cat jumped, and lied on my lap, and did so for four hours! "Aww Colbert ♥ ' s you :)"

My favorite working book title for growing up with Asperger's Syndrome: "If you don't know, I'm not going to tell you". 8/29/11 Aspies are not common and therefore lack that sense.

CMLO Andrew I really enjoy your graphic work and the interesting you facts you connect regarding Syosset & the vernacular of today etc. By far, the photo of the Theatre is my favorite nostalgia. Though I don't qualify for your Sy-Fl page...

 8/14/11 It just occurred to me that "The Christian Science Monitor" is an oxymoron. Are Atheists covered by their insurance company for acts of God?

8/6/11: I walked to my pool today. It was hot out. When I got to my Cabana, I was hot, so I took off my T-shirt. I was hot. I walked along my veranda,and jumped into the pool. It was hot. After a while, I walked out of the pool for a while. I was hot. Later, after I walked home, and walked inside, it was delightful!

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