Thursday, December 30, 2010

My Focus

I have received MAIL. A reader asked me: "My only questions is, why focus on the Asberger's aspect of your personality as opposed to your entire personality? You are Andrew before you are someone with Asberger's Syndrome."

I do not understand your reply above. An Aspie is someone who has Asperger's Syndrome. As an Aspie, I do not think the same way as NT people do. I explain primarily myself in my Web Log, especially with what I individual write. My primary interest is for the reader outside of me, to discover, know, and understand me. To say that I am an Aspie, helps one understand me through an established general definition. Your difference from me is invisible, and has a significance. Someone's race (like black or white) is noticeable but has no tangible difference in who one is. Every individual has a unique personality. Aspie does not mean or define one's personality. My personality is affected by using the Aspie operating system. I was born that way, as well as being named Andrew. It is who I am. As consequence of this, some commonalities of me and Aspie's are noticeable when compared to NT's. My Blog represents me as an individual first. It has been a very frustrating and lonely life for me. It was for not knowing my specific parameters or restraints when compared with typical people. Finally discovering the name of A.S., for my set of parameters, has given me profound focus, understanding, confidence, and
empowerment. I now know my unique gifts of strengths, a
nd defined limits. So as to promote greater understanding, communication, and cooperation of all people, I am driven to make all people, Aspie or NoT, know of our differences. I know myself, and report what I can most identify with in traits of all others. I explain these similarities I have with Aspies, and the differences with NT's. NTs are not all the same, neither are Aspies all the same. I have sets of similarities with "New Yorkers", Jews, and Aspie's. I do not share all traits or characteristics of either of these groups. However to know them, helps to understand me. I explain how a Typical Aspie is like me. I do not try to fit any stereotype of what an Aspie is. I was born a Jew. I do not deny I am a Jew. However, I find religion, such as being Jewish, inconsequential. I am not religious. I am Agnostic. I do not define this as my religious identity or persuasion. It is my purpose for living. That is of seeking knowledge for its own sake. I hope that others, who read the information that I provide, can help them realize their identity and focus, for a more productive and meaningful life. I am very much a unique individual first, and am not easily persuaded to conform. In some ways, it is impossible to conform to Typical people. I do not have a disease. There is nothing to be cured. I love who I am the way I am. This individual thinking is a strong commonality of Aspie's that contrasts us from NTs. I am an Aspie. Get used to it!

A few common traits of Aspies include
  • Small talk is difficult
  • Can become confused in complex social situations
  • Extremely detail oriented and focused on facts
  • Ability to focus for extended periods on a specific task
  • Difficulty interpreting and understanding what others feel and think
  • Maybe he believes he has no personality outside the Aspergers Syndrom personality.
  • Andrew I. Lerner Are you referring to the question asked by my reader at the very top of this posting? If so, it appears that you are assuming that the reader is a "he" and an Aspie. Is this true? Below that question, is my long answer. Is your statement addressed at MY explanation? Please, I look forward to your clarification. "Aspie does not mean or define one's personality."
    Maybe he believes he has no personality outside the Asperger's Syndrom personality?
  • Are you referring to the question asked by my reader at the very top of this posting? If so, it appears that you are assuming that the reader is a "he" and an Aspie. Is this true? Below that question, is my long answer. Is your statement addressed at MY explanation? Please, I look forward to your clarification.
  • Andrew I. Lerner ‎"Aspie does not mean or define one's personality."
  • Some folks when reading constantly about how you state you are Aspie may think that.Others may think you may use "ASPIE" to label yourself and follow some sort of guidelines that have been established by other information out there posted by researchers, doctors, ASPIES etc.
    • Andrew I. Lerner TY for this insight. I am so relieved to find out who I am, I want to save others from that struggle, and help others to understand them.
    • OK. Just try to think outside of the ASPIE box once in a while, which I know you do. Find a NT list and try a few of the listed charasteristics. You may surprize yourself!
    • Andrew I. Lerner Aspies think outside of the box. Most or typical people are in the proverbial box. Ironically, Aspies also have difficulty with the meaning and use of proverbs. My goal is to educate people how Aspies think. I provide this as my mission to... founder understanding and cooperation with this invisible disability both have with each-other. By doing so, people will also better understand me, and why I act the way I do. I and we do not react in the same way for the same reasons as an NT. I have personality traits that are shared with all other people. You can discover those by interacting with me. They are not specific to being NT or Aspie. There is not need for me to list them. However I have learned to use proverbs as most NTs do, as an example. The number one theme I come across in learning about our differences, is rudeness. For example, I have a hard time guessing what people mean or how they feel. I have decided, since I am often wrong, that I must depend on their explicit description on how they feel. I often hope they will do this. I want to avoid doing something that would be" inappropriate", offend, or hurt your feelings. I do not do things intentionally for this as a goal. I am not belligerent If I can not tell you how you expected me to have felt when I did something that that unknowingly offended you. To avoid upsetting people, I often ask them many questions to find out how they would feel, to help guide me of how I should act. They ofen have a hard time answering, or get annoyed by this. Hopefully you can see my continuous frustration. I experience "after guilt", when it is explained by them, after my action, that I upset them. NT "characteristics" have been treated as the standard" It is the different way in which Aspies process information that needs to be made aware of by all Neuros.
It is rare that people have the courage to be so open, honest, blunt and direct to me. People instead get constantly annoyed by me because I do not know.

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